I’ve had “Part 2 of Holy Yoga Retreat” on my to-do list all summer long! And I just haven’t been able to do it! I reread my notes from the week and remember what an amazing experience it was – but then never felt my words were even close to adequate in sharing what I learned… So I never hit publish…
And I began to wonder … If I’m struggling to clearly communicate messages that so utterly inspired me to, in turn, motivate others, what exactly am I doing here at EFF? And, if I’m not able to write clearly here on this blog, are my social media posts any different?
And so began a summer of scrutinizing my own use of screen time… which as most of you likely already know by now, resulted in my new convictions to step back from Everyday Faith and Fitness at this season in life.
For those of you who haven’t already read the story… here’s the email:
(And for those that have – I apologize! I just wanted to cover my bases so no one was in the dark about why I’ve disappeared!)
First and foremost, I’ll begin with an apology. When I first began Everyday Faith and Fitness (almost 2 and 1/2 years ago!), I had grand plans of blogging 2-3 times a week, writing a monthly newsletter, motivating weary moms to live well and love life. And, well, those plans have crumbled bit by bit over time…. And for that I am sorry.
I’m sort of a perfectionist – and it’s hard for me to admit failure – but as I’ve taken a step back this summer to evaluate this thing I call my life, I’ve realized some pretty important things.
One of my messages has always been about SIMPLICITY. Margin. White space. Room to breathe. Time to sleep. (Even 30 minutes workouts. And a superfood shake to simplify a meal too).
But in my attempts to encourage others in this area, I realized I have failed myself.
I was setting my alarm at 5am (instead of just naturally waking up around 5:30 – which doesn’t seem like a huge difference, but knowing that I’m waking when my body feels rested rather than because the clock says so, definitely puts me in a mentally different place to start my day).
And on top of that, for awhile, I wasn’t going to bed until after midnight – which is CERTAINLY not part of my natural DNA!
Part of my (illogical) reasoning when I started this venture was that then I could have something productive to do with my time while my husband worked on charts, followed up with patients, called coaches to discuss athletes’ injuries, etc. after the boys went to bed. (Instead of just falling asleep right away myself!)
But then I started “outworking” him – and we still weren’t going to bed at the same time.
And as much as I wanted EFF to just be an early morning/late at night kind of deal, I found myself wanting to be involved with some aspect of it nearly all day long.
Business calls. Motivational webinars. Social media check-ins.
All things that I enjoyed and WANTED to be doing… but …
my boys were getting to watch “just one more episode” while mommy finished up responding to these emails and comments.
So, I began unsubscribing from nearly every email list, unfollowing most social media accounts, and I realized how hypocritical I was being in continuing to pursue Everyday Faith and Fitness at the same time.
Find freedom without Facebook – but follow me and like my posts.
Enjoy life from somewhere other than behind the 2×4 screen of your phone – but double tap my Instagram images.
Oh friends, it’s exhausting…
So then, I questioned whether I was just being lazy. Should I just suck it up and work harder? Deal with less sleep? (and simultaneously figure out how to not be such a grouch because of it?!)
I don’t think so….
Today, the Pray as You Go app read Ecclesiastes 3. And, wow, it was perfect to hear. There is indeed a time for everything. And I don’t regret my time pouring into EFF.
I’ve met so many amazing women all around the world from this! Literally!
Local friendships have developed deeper…
My adventure into Holy Yoga wouldn’t have happened without it…
Sure, I made some judgment errors when investing in this business. (I still have quite a stock of T-shirts and tank tops if anyone is interested! And a digital, at-home postage scale. Anyone want one of those?… (It saved me from making so many trips to the post office with two boys in tow to mail out packages!))
But, yes, there is a time for everything. And, after lots and lots of prayer, it seems – at least for now – my focus needs to be on my family and in-the-flesh ministry opportunities.
If I want my sons to use less screen, I need to model that behavior myself.
Trying to figure out Facebook algorithms.
Editing images (after taking multiple shots).
Trying to stay on top of new social media trends (Instagram stories, anyone?).
It’s just not speaking to me…
So I’ll be stepping back from social media and biz-like things to just savor and appreciate what is naturally happening before me instead of feeling like I should try to conjure up more interest and social media presence.
Literally laying it all down – and just letting God do with it whatever He wants.
So again, please accept my apology for not doing a better job of encouraging and motivating you more if that’s what you had been hoping for.
[But just to clarify… I still love Shakeology and my Beachbody workouts to the core! And I will still be a “coach” by name and can help you individually if needed, but I won’t be running any large-scale challenge groups – at least for right now].
So I guess some final thoughts:
* When it comes to fitness – move more. eat real food.
* When it comes to faith – talk to Him. then listen.
* And when it comes to everyday – ENJOY.
Praying – oh so sincerely – that you will LIVE WELL and LOVE LIFE.
If you’ve made it this far, thank you for reading this long overdue message! But now, seriously… feel free to put down your phone or close your laptop and go hang with the real people in your presence 🙂
Love you! And thank you for being a part of this journey!